2011 Why Working on Oneself is Important - through Vlogging and Blogging

Growing up in this world, I was taught that there is such a thing as Human Nature. This human nature is not necessarily clearly defined and there is still debate as to what Human Nature 'truly means' - however I was taught, through hearing others speak about it and write about it that Human Nature is that which guides our decisions and that it is also absolute - meaning that one's nature is who one is and is not able to be changed. In looking at this claim, I see that underneath it, is the desire to not take responsibility for one's nature and to instead place oneself or others as a victim/victims to 'Human Nature' in essence as an excuse to not have to change. I am not claiming that I know for certain that 'Human Nature' is able to be changed - although I can say that I have met a number of people who, from my perspective believe that it can be and have shown me in various ways that it is possible. These are the people who participate with Desteni.

One thing I have learned from my participation and interaction with those who form the group called, Desteni, is that if Human Nature is to be changed, it must be changed at the individual level - meaning there is no 'thing out there' which is actually human nature - human nature is the result of who and what each Human accept themselves to be. If I accept that I am flawed and broken and that I will never do anything but abuse - then that is what I accept as my nature. But when I really look at it - in self-honesty I cannot say that I can see my 'nature' directly - meaning, I have observed the way in which I have participated in this world in my reality and based on that I have formed an idea of 'who I am' and yet it is completely in relation to everything around me - I learned behaviors from my parents - I learned about money from them and from others, I learned how to deceive and how to manipulate from others - this is not to blame anyone else - because obviously, I have accepted that these behaviors are who I am, but the point really is that I have accepted and allowed "Who I am" to be dictated by others' examples - meaning I have learned my own 'nature' through observation and repetition. The point thus is that Human Nature is not necessarily 'set in stone' but rather the result of one's environment in combination with one's acceptance of that and participation within the points that one accepts about one's reality and environment.

Now that I have come to realize that my 'nature' is actually who I am accepting myself to be - this implies that I am able to change my nature. It doesn't mean that I can necessarily change the form that I am in - but it does imply that the form that I am in is not everything and all of Who I am. Meaning I am more than the form I am (if I will accept myself as that). Now, when I look at this point, it sounds nice, but practically - I don't see that anything has really changed due to this realization - which implies that simply realizing that who we are is more than what we currently are is not in itself enough to change things.

Because, self-honestly I am not satisfied with the way things exist - I am not satisfied with the fact that so many in this world starve and that literally everyone I interact with has no concern for me nor do I have any concern for them. I am not satisfied with the fact that being born into this world means being born into debt and that one's entire life is already planned out from beginning to end simply as a means of paying this debt until one leaves this world. I am not satisfied that what is here is abused and manipulated into simply being a system for some to profit and experience their desires while the vast majority are made to feel and be nothing more than a means to the few achieving their desires.

In looking at 'how one change' I have realize that this does not come simply from realize that this world is fucked up or from wanting things to be different. I also realize that I, at this moment, am not in fact able to change this world on my own and that self-honestly if I had never came across Desteni I would probably not be writing this statement. I would most likely be simply wondering why I was suffering and not looking at the real source of suffering in this world - which is actually ME.

See it is this ME that I accept myself as - the 'who I am' that I apparently has desires, and thoughts, and feelings, and has emotions which is the very source of my suffering and the source of all suffering in this world. And it is the belief that things will ever change without actually changing the 'who I am' that is the single greatest delusion that exists in this world - and it is that single delusion that I am only now beginning to question. And that implies that I have to question everything - what I have been taught, what I believe I know, my own desires, my thoughts, my fantasies. None of these are valid as they are all things I have simply accepted without question.

And so this is why blogging and vlogging is so important - because through blogging and vlogging - I am able to firstly start questioning who and what I have accepted myself to be and to within that express specifically the points that I am accepting and allowing that are limiting me to a design that I would not choose if I was being true to who I am really am - which is Life - that which even allows things like thoughts and experiences to exist - I am giving Life to these points - I am accepting and allowing myself as Life to be limited to an existence that is actually less than who I really am. And we are all doing this, of course. Life is not something 'outside' of us that 'happens to us'. We are Life - just as the animals are Life, and the plants are Life and the soil and rocks and air are Life. Of course through accepting ourselves as separate from this we have accepted and allowed through time for things to develop into the forms that currently exist - but the point is that if we continue to accept this delusion that we are less than Life and that everything in our reality is less than Life - then nothing will ever change - and yet all we actually have to do, firstly, is realize that we are Life and that everything is One and Equal to Life then there is actually the possibility for things to change.

That does not excuse us from what currently exists - just as we have gotten to this point over time, it will most likely take some time to walk backwards to a point where nothing of our currently accepted limitations as what exists now exists any longer. But that is mostly just speculation on my part in any case - I guess we will have to see what happens - but really though, how can we continue as we are - accepting something less than who we are ?

Through vlogging and blogging I am assisting myself to take apart the layers that I have accepted and allowed to define me and through writing I am able to redesign myself from a new starting point - by using the principle that I am One and Equal to what I accept and allow - I am able to through writing no longer accept myself as One and Equal to anything but Life - which is a process, I am aware, and it will take time, and it will require every bit of strength and discipline that I have - but in the end I am going to have to trust myself that I actually care about Life which means that I actually care about myself and that I actually care about every single particle of this existence and everything that I am not even aware of.

When it comes down to it - trusting myself in essence means that I decide that I am of worth and that Life is of worth. And so through blogging and vlogging I am able to see where I am still placing value not on Life and not in myself as Life, and thus to correct this through the writing by allowing myself as Life to come through in the words and thus to then Live those words as myself.